all made up with nowhere to go

I said on twitter about a week ago that I think DA:I gave me the brainworms back in 2015, because now it's installed on the PS4, and now I am playing it, I cannot stop thinking about it. So much so that, when I found out DAII (my favourite of the three) was on sale on Steam, I immediately went and checked the specs to see if it was playable on my PC (it is! And I added it to my wishlist, so I'll know when it goes on sale again).

I spent the bus ride home from my x-ray appointment thinking about Certain Things in DA:I. I started thinking about music videos again, for the first time in YEARS. I wouldn't make any, but certainly being able to capture footage directly from your console (say) would make some of that ninety percent easier? (Don't answer that, it's not something I'm seriously thinking about).

I may even be close to remembering the idea I had while listening to I'd Do Anything For Love that one time - I'm beginning to suspect it may have been a DA fic, which would absolutely make sense, give what remnants of the idea I did remember. (Although given that I was possibly thinking about paladins, it could have been knights in general, but I strongly doubt it, even though knights in general is a Thing™, even if I don't talk about it, which I don't).

So anyway, I am playing the glitchiest version of DA:I ever, I swear. I do not remember it being this bad on the 360, but maybe I just blanked that out, or straight up decided I didn't need to remember it. But yeah, it's mostly pathfinding errors (everyone in my team finds it impossible to stand still at points, lol).

I am currently about 15 hours in. I'm not saying exactly where, because I am aware I have friends on here who would still like to avoid spoilers. Which is why everything else is going under a cut!

( spoilers under here! )

And that's basically that, for now. I probably had other stuff to say, but I have since forgotten it because I didn't tweet it, because spoilers!

~

In other news, as I mentioned, I had my hand and foot x-rays, and now I know how feet are x-rayed! Also I thought I'd get lost in the hospital, since it is a Maze of Epic Proportions, only to end up finding the corridor leading to the x-ray dept very familiar*, and turning up for my appointment around forty minutes early. Although that lead to me getting seen earlier, which meant I got back into town sooner, and home sooner than I expected (although unfortunately I ended up back in my town at school letting out time, which meant annoying teenagers on the bus, sighs).

Then I had the dentist yesterday, and he was relatively pleased with the state of my mouth, so yay!

However, my shopping trolley that I use to carry heavy stuff in decided one of the wheels ought to break, while I was legging it for the bus home, so that was a fun time! I don't know if they're replaceable, or if I will have buy a whole new trolley, but ugh. Mind you, the whole thing has lasted me nearly four years, which is longer than I thought it might (as it was cheap), so that's the only positive I'm seeing about it right now.

[Edit from the future]: the wheels are not replaceable - I tried to get both covers off the bit that attaches to the axle with no luck, so new trolley it is, sighs [/eta]

~

*I've spent a lot of time in said hospital (but not for health reasons, apart from when I had my wisdom teeth out).

No, you spent some of the last few days watching videos about what Final Fantasy Versus XIII could have been and got sad. And then watched some more videos where some fans took some stuff that happens in KHIII way too literally and got kind of annoyed at them (and also annoyed at Nomura, because if these people are right, then he just doesn't know how to let things be. I get not wanting to abandon a neat idea, and I am sad Versus XIII didn't happen, but also like, he had a chance to make it happen, and things didn't pan out, and maybe they weren't meant to. It feels harsh saying that, but it is kind of how I feel).

This started from reading how much of FFXV was cut before it got released. Which also made me sad, because I'm sure most of you reading this already know my feelings about the game we got. (tl;dr version: it could have been so, so much better).

~

In other game news, Johnny streamed the last part of The Excavation of Hob's Barrow yesterday and oh wow. That did not go where I expected (although I'm kind of glad about that).

It was definitely the right game for the season, and it definitely gave me the spoops, as I literally jumped when I got an email notification on my phone after the stream had ended.

I'd definitely recommend it, if you like point and click games that are kind of creepy.

~

And then, in me related things: I went to Burnley in search of cat food**, and ended up buying some new pens and pencils, because I'm me. And Dragon Age: Inquisition for the PS4.

I promise I did get the cat food, too. I actually managed to find it in the store I hoped would have it for cheap, so that was good!

The pens are Zebra Ola gel pens, and some Sharpie gel pens which I ordinarily wouldn't have got, but they were half marked price, making them £2 for three pens! The pencils are some Staedtler ones I've never heard of, but since my favourite ever pencils are the Noris yellow and black ones, I thought I would give these a try.

So yeah, DA:I.

I don't know that I will play it any time soon, but at least I have it now? I'm mostly excited about running around Crestwood before closing the rift there, because that's my favourite part of the game. I also like the deserty levels a lot, but I realised Crestwood is where my heart really wants to be, heh.

It's taken me a good nine months to get hold of it. Like, CEX's website has said repeatedly that Burnley's store has had one singular copy in, but I've never been able to find it until now, as it was not with the rest of the games whose titles start with Dragon, which didn't help! I think it's down to people not putting stuff back where they got it from, as I also picked up Code Vein to look at, realised it wasn't in the right place, and slotted it back where it needed to be.

Other than that, I now actually have a physical copy of Gideon the Ninth to read! It is sitting on my desk, awaiting my picking it up and looking at it. I think the writing style will be okay; I flicked through a couple of pages and it didn't seem grating, so hopefully I will get on all right with it!

And that's about it for now.

~

*By which I mean, Gamers™.

**Jazz is picky, and will only eat one brand of wet food, which I've been having difficulty getting hold of of late.

thenicochan exclaimed: TELL ME ABOUT YOUR MAIN INQUISITOR

My main inquisitor is called Nikolai. He is a Trevelyan, and thus human. You can see my drawings of him here, and an actual photo of his actual face here. This is still my favourite pic that I ever drew of him.

He is a grade A dork. He is also extremely terrible at saving the world as he, like Nev Shepard, responds to things as though it were me making the decisions. And I frequently make terrible decisions, let me tell you. I can't remember the outcome of big decisions, but I remember they mostly didn't go well.

He romanced Dorian (because GUH), and I'd like to think they were very happy together (and he gets easily flustered, so you can imagine how that went). I would like to ignore what Bioware says re: how all that ends because that's an easy way to make a very sad Jae. Also Bioware are talking out of their arses.

I took the Templars over the mages when making that decision, because I'd decided for whatever reason that Nikolai would be super religious. I also thought this meant you'd have to work extra hard to win Dorian round, which would've been really interesting, but didn't happen. Which also makes for a sad Jae, but what can you do?

He also really believes he's the herald of Andraste.

He has a broken nose but I pushed the slider too far, and it looks sort of wrong, but I kept it anyway because it ended up forcing me to draw one. So I guess that's all good. I don't know why he broke it, but he probably ended up on the wrong end of someone's fist.

He was warrior (but I can't remember if two-handed or one) because Leila (my first inquisitor) had been a rogue, as I'd thought that would suit a Cadash. When I picked specialisations, I went for Templar, because super religious Chantry boy and also IDK I felt like making his and Dorian's relationship a bit weird. Not that Dorian seems to object, so I guess we're all good.

(I continued this trend with Llew. Who is an elf. And we all know how Vints feel about elves, right?)

So that is pretty much all I can tell you/remember about Nikolai! One day I'm going to go back and replay his game because ~feels~ about Dorian. (One day I might even do it on a PS4, oh my goodness).

I've been up since 6:30 am because cat!

~

I have done a fair amount of writing over the last few days. This is good. I did eight times my daily word count the day before yesterday.

Which is to say that making the wiki did its job. I'd forgotten so many of the fine details that I had to go back and look at the entire thing. Which is good, because now I have a couple of plot devices that are not as awkward as the last one I came up with. In fact, one of them I'd thought of a year ago, but done nothing with because I wasn't sure how to integrate it. But now I am. This is good.

Also this story is rapidly turning into boyfriends in space but fuck it I don't care. I'm sick of trying to be subtle about it.

(Also also I'm thinking I'm going to cut seventy percent of the stuff I'm writing for them at the moment because it doesn't add to the story/plot, it's just me getting a handle on their relationship. But all writing is GOOD, so it's staying for now).

~

I've been playing DA:I again for the last two days. I tried to play on my birthday, but got really bored, really fast. And then left the xbox alone for three weeks, and now here we are!

I managed to save Ser Barris, which I didn't know was a thing you could do, until I accidentally killed him the last time I did the Templar route. I am pleased about that, because oooh Ser Barris. (This game wrecks my hormones, I swear to god).

And finally, I am flirting with Cullen, and it is grade A hilarious with how awkward his responses are to you (the latest one featured an awkward silence following a whole, "well I'm glad you're alive" after which Rhian was like, "right, I'm going now.") I suppose at least he realises he's being flirted with. Though it would be super hilarious if he didn't.

(And, of course, Dorian has turned up and not flirting with him is SO HARD, you guys, SO HARD. I know it won't go anywhere because obviously Rhian is a lady, but goddamn. SO HARD).

ALSO EXCITE ABOUT CALPERNIA BC I LOVE HER. (I wonder if I can get her to surrender without fighting again?)

Have some Dragon Age mumblings, because I am a predictable pile of me:

~ I've been playing Inquisition for the first time since we got the new TV, and I still think the banter's fucked (though I'm new gaming, and still only have Varric, Cassandra and Solas, so IDK??) but I seem to be getting a higher incidence of background music. Also thanks to the speakers on said new TV, I can actually hear the songs in the pubs! \o/

~ I googled "fuck you bioware" this morning, because I was feeling like that, and the top result was a NeoGAF thread where people were complaining that Bioware were shit now (and had been since anything after Baldur's Gate 2!) and essentially they said that the company was pandering to SJWs, without actually mentioning the term.

I don't even know.

(Also I don't understand people who complain about a thing, and then keep getting that thing, but they keep complaining. I suppose it's that they're hoping it will improve, but you might think after this long that it's not going to improve in the way they want).

~ Aw shit, there's a job op at Bioware for a writer BUT. It's got ten thousand notes, and the spec includes a few things I can't do like make a thing in Twine or work in Canada (I mean, I could, legally and all that shit, but I can't because I have commitments here *sighs*).

(At least the writing job's still going, for now, unlike that time I saw a voice acting job. Though I don't trust my acting skills and, again, I wouldn't be able to drop everything and fuck off to Canada).

~ I now have decent references of all my inquisitors! I'm eventually going to do the same for my Hawkes (although Merrick is easy because he has no hair). YAY DRAWING REFERENCES. (newest Lavellan appears to be one of my Hawkes in Elven form. I don't even).

I forgot to say that I finished Daughter of Smoke and Bone. I asked the library to buy the second book, because they have the first and the third (it is a trilogy, in case I hadn't mentioned that), but not the second. So, hopefully they will pony up and get that.

I really enjoyed it and, actually, while I had a minor gripe with the romance, it wasn't that bad? (I don't approve of absolute love at first sight, but other than that it was OK. I mean they didn't spend pages and pages expounding their absolute love for each other, or whining about how they missed each other when not together, so I call that a win).

~

I finished up ME3 the other day, and made THE WORST DECISION I HAVE EVER MADE IN ANY GAME EVER. THE WORST.

THANKS FOR RIPPING OUT MY SOUL, BIOWARE.

Also Steve absolutely broke my heart because he thought Shepard was coming back alive and no, nope, that most definitely was not happening.

(Now replaying Eirian Hawke in DAII because I never finished Isabela's romance properly, Eirian is my baby, and I am in need of all the happy feels right now).

~

Game meme, questions 26 - 30 (aka The End!)

all the questions

My answers (which include a wild HUGE DA:I spoiler!!! so don't read it if you haven't played/finished it) :

( Read more... )

Wow, this meme ended on an anti-climax...

So I never posted about the end of DA:I when I finished up Nikolai's game. Also some talking about Llew, because I'm weak and I started A NEW GAME BECAUSE OF COURSE I NEEDED TO DO THAT. (Mage boyfriend temptation too strong, man, TOO STRONG. I know I could've just rerun Nikolai, but elf son. I wanted to make an elf son).

( spoilers, as per )

I think I might have a problem? Is there like a Bioware addicts anonymous because I've never done this with any game ever before in my life and I mean what even is this? I love Mass Effect to small squishy pieces but I can't and haven't played it three times in a row I don't understand.

So on Tuesday, I went to see my sister in law, and nephew. My nephew is two and a half, and is entranced by touchscreen phones (also tablets, but this is relevant to my phone). We're flicking through the pictures on my phone, he sees one of my mage boyfriend (who looks like this - in fact it was that exact pic), and he yells, "PAPA!" in a delighted tone of voice because he thinks it's my brother/his dad.

I.

Swear.

I have never been so mortified in all my life.

(For reference, this is me, from a few years ago, and my brother looks a lot like me, except more masculine, and somewhat older. And he has a beard).

Also, I decided to finish off DA:I again because I got bored of running about killing things, and mum woke up during the middle of the final boss fight. She watched me crush accordingly (I'm not giving details because I don't want to spoil/make a text cut, also irrelevant), then as we're watching the scenes after, she's all, "Who's this? Who's that?"

On pointing out my mage boyfriend, she said, "He doesn't look much like that drawing you did of him."

I replied that that was because I drew my inquisitor, not my boyfriend.

"Oh," she said.

Then she got annoyed because she was just sitting and watching, even though it didn't interest her. I told her the next logical step was to get her playing. To which she replied, "NO."

*snerk*

(You may think I am being mean to my mum, but she actually has played video games in the past. Admittedly not since the early nineties, but she has. I see no reason why she might not again).

And thus endeth my Dragon Age adventures for the time being.

~ Thing the first: I am going to make a voice post! And I am going to post it to my soundcloud! I would like your input!

What I would like you to do is ask me a question (or two). ANYTHING. And also supply me with the most ridiculous sounding French word you know, because I'm going to do that French-in-a-Yorkshire accent thing, too. I have a microphone on my laptop, I might as well use it.

I am trying to break myself of feeling stupid when I talk out loud (because reasons), so if you can help me do it, you have my thanks :)

~ Thing the second: I figured out (I think) why I really don't like Dragon Age: Origins. It doesn't have a mage boyfriend ;) (nah, there are actual reasons why I don't like Origins, but, you know DAII and DA:I have mage boyfriends, and I like both of them just fine).

~ Thing the third: I'm going to make a male elf mage for next time on DA:I (because I want to see how lolarious the shittest world state is. THIS I LIKE THIS. BEING ABLE TO COMPLETELY WRECK THINGS AS WELL AS MAKE THEM GOOD IS MY JAM. GOOD JOB, BIOWARE. I was going to romance either Solas (I believe that's tricky though) or Cullen but. Um. *embarrassed cough* yeah. I'm in mage boyfriend hell and I DON'T CARE.

(There is actually SO FUCKING MUCH I COULD SAY ABOUT DORIAN and how he's like. If I'd invented my perfect character, I couldn't have done that well? I swear someone actually read my mind because HOLY FUCK).

~ Thing the fourth: I want to write a couple of posts about DA:I - one about facets of the characters that are like me (just because I find it interesting - and anyone who wants to is welcome to disagree with my results). But also I want to talk about triggering content. I've had some really bad reactions triggered by a couple of things in the game, and I wanted to write about that, too (if only to get the bloody thing off my chest). ( cut for mention of self-harm ).

~ Thing the fifth: I've been awake since 5:30am, had no naps or anything, and I feel kind of like I'm buzzing? I'm not supposed to be bipolar, so I don't think I'm manic but ???? It's like I used to feel when I was at cons aka really fucking weird on little sleep.

~ Thing the sixth: I'm going to post this now, because I don't think I have anything else to say.

Played some DA:I for the first time in forever (I wants my mage boyfriend, precious). I haven't played it in over two weeks, I think? Also I tried, for about the fiftieth time, a forced save on Leila so that she will turn up in the Keep. I'm not holding my breath, and if she still isn't, I might send Bioware some feedback (I know they're not in open beta any more, but I expect they still welcome feedback).

(GRR ARGH NO SHE'S STILL NOT THERE).

I forgot what a dork Nikolai looks like (partly because my drawings look nothing like him, heh).

It's so cool noticing the little changes depending on how different your world state is (I had a conversation with Varric about Kirkwall, and eeeee I love I love I love).

So anyway, I'm doing the Templar route this time, so I will have to do major making up to Dorian when he finally joins (I've seen him in game already because apparently you can go to Redcliffe without having to follow through on helping the mages. I didn't know you could do that!) All I have to say about it so far is OMIGOSH SER BARRIS.

(Why are there so many attractive people in this game?? This is not good for my hormones, Bioware!)

~

Still writing! I've run out two pens on this story so far. Wheeeeee! Trying to write warm and fuzzies just because, and it ends up not being fuzzies and I'm not happy about that. ALSO. That thing where the character who I thought would be my main character (because she was in the original story) and now I think she might not be? Yeah. That.

I've got a bit of writing that I might put up in a few days (it's not going to be in the finished story unless it's required for a flashback, but I doubt it).