(no subject)

I love* how every person who tells me they don't want to use hand sanitiser because it's making their hands all dry and cracked thinks they're the only one this happens to. And it's almost always men, as well.

But, like, fuck off, my dudes. It's not just you. And use some bloody moisturiser when you get home! It doesn't cure it, but it does help!


*I don't

~

I'd like to say I have only been feeling woefully insecure about my artistic talents recently, but this is a lie. I mean, I am having a MASSIVE wobble, right now, as I type this, but it's nothing new. I'm just feeling worse than usual at the moment.

Like, part of the reason I haven't been posting stuff as much is because I don't feel it's worth sharing. Aside from the fact that I really have not been doing much drawing this year. But even with all the embroidery/cross stitch I've done, I still haven't shared most of it. I feel like I've lost all confidence in my skills completely. It also doesn't help that I want to paint, but every time I think about it, I end up feeling really weird about it, so then I don't, and then I feel bad. (I wish I could explain that better, but I can't).

And like, I've spent a lot of this year drawing patterns and plant doodles, and then feeling bad about it because I "should" be drawing full, "proper" illustrations (whatever the heck that means). Because if my brain can find something to latch on and feel guilty about, you bet it will. This is just the latest thing in a long, long list.

I think I need to stop twisting myself in knots about everything, but this year is really not helping with that.

~

In happier news!

We have a new person at work, and they are totally into video games, so that makes at least three of us now, so yaaaaay! (I think also the other new person is into games, but I haven't really talked to her much about them, so I don't really know).

I lent my work friend Enigma by Peter Milligan, and she LOVED IT, which was great, because I was terrified she'd come back to me and go, "WHAT IS THIS NONSENSE!" She's going to reread it and also lend it to her boyfriend, and I think that's great. (I should've known she'd like it, really. She liked Archer's Goon, and that's some hecking weirdness right there).

I braved Burnley the other day to buy birthday cards. It wasn't the best idea, but I did need to do it. And it was a good idea, of sorts, as it turns out Clinton's were having a £1 pen sale, so I got FIVE Pilot pens for £5! Normally one pen costs £4! so I have saved a lot! I also bought some more biros and some gel pens in Poundland, and then immediately felt guilty about spending money, because yay brains! And like, I didn't spend the most money on me. The most money was spent on cards for my brother and nephew, and also on a birthday present for my nephew, so ???? (My nephew's birthday isn't for a while yet, but I thought I'd get the presents now, rather than leaving it till last minute and panicking).

I think that's everything for now. I think I'm going to go and bake something and see if that helps me feel a bit better.