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I have not been really feeling the Xmas vibe this year, and I think it's because 2020 was 2020. Maybe.
So all I did was put up a small tree, but not the lights (couldn't be bothered); I barely sent any Xmas cards, in spite of thinking at the end of November that I needed to get on and send one to my rellies in Australia (I still haven't); and I had a terrible time finding presents for my nephew, or even the motivation to look for them (I managed okay in the end, though).
I also thought everything might be a disaster, and I just wasn't really looking forward to Xmas day at all.
This culminated, on Xmas eve, in me getting really upset and missing my mum strongly for the first time in a long time*, and then I was bummed out for the rest of the day/into Xmas morning. I did think, because of how strongly and abruptly it came on, that I was going to get a migraine for Xmas, but luckily, I did not!
And Xmas day was fine, so IDK what I was worried about! I got actual presents! And some money that I am going to buy art supplies with, because of course I am. So far I have spent over an hour stewing on what to buy, because yay guilt at spending money!
(note from the future: I eventually got two Finetec paints, and some lino printing things - i.e. new lino, some ink, and a roller).
I thought I would have more to say, but I don't, really. I might drop in again before the new year (depending on energy levels), but if I don't, I hope y'all are doing all right.
~
*It's not that I don't miss her, because of course I do, but this was the first time for a while where I was like, "I wish she were here to share this with".
So all I did was put up a small tree, but not the lights (couldn't be bothered); I barely sent any Xmas cards, in spite of thinking at the end of November that I needed to get on and send one to my rellies in Australia (I still haven't); and I had a terrible time finding presents for my nephew, or even the motivation to look for them (I managed okay in the end, though).
I also thought everything might be a disaster, and I just wasn't really looking forward to Xmas day at all.
This culminated, on Xmas eve, in me getting really upset and missing my mum strongly for the first time in a long time*, and then I was bummed out for the rest of the day/into Xmas morning. I did think, because of how strongly and abruptly it came on, that I was going to get a migraine for Xmas, but luckily, I did not!
And Xmas day was fine, so IDK what I was worried about! I got actual presents! And some money that I am going to buy art supplies with, because of course I am. So far I have spent over an hour stewing on what to buy, because yay guilt at spending money!
(note from the future: I eventually got two Finetec paints, and some lino printing things - i.e. new lino, some ink, and a roller).
I thought I would have more to say, but I don't, really. I might drop in again before the new year (depending on energy levels), but if I don't, I hope y'all are doing all right.
~
*It's not that I don't miss her, because of course I do, but this was the first time for a while where I was like, "I wish she were here to share this with".